Star Academy

  Once again, this month, I would like to congratulate our administration. The new on-line recruitment system is a pure marvel. First, its nomenclature is in itself a wonder: “Galaxy”. With such a name I am pretty sure that from now on only top stars will join the UN. Furthermore it is so simple that even the least enlightened managers will be able to use it. With one click they will be able to post a vacancy on the net and another click will enable you to apply. Isn’t that marvellous!

The only problem with this magic tool is that instead of projecting the Organization into the 23^rd century, it takes it back to the 16^th, when nepotism was at its summit.

Up to now, any recruitment had to pass in front of a joint appointment panel. This panel was able, to some extent, prevent Mr X or Ms Y from bringing in their “intimate” friends.

The progress achieved is that from now on, the new system will allow you to recruit anybody you wish, and this only because there is no longer any control.

The process is the following: a group called “Central Review Body” receives all job descriptions before they are advertised. It checks whether the qualifications required are in line with the post. For example, it makes sure that a plumber is not asked to fly a plane or be able to compute purchasing power parities. The second task of the group is to ensure that out of the 500 applicants all are plumbers and not pilots or economists. That being done, the manager can select without any restriction any one of the 500 plumbers. The only conditions to be matched are the preferred eye colour and perhaps the ability of the applicant to fulfil all the requests of the manager.

Thanks again to our administration for making such dramatic efforts to increase the morale of the managers, who from now on will finally be able to work only with “good friends”.

Editor-in-Chief: Jean Michel Jakobowicz